NYC nanny shares: How do they work?

One popular - and hotly debated - type of childcare in NYC is the nanny share. Perhaps you don’t need help full time, or you’re looking for an affordable alternative to daycare in New York. You may know another neighborhood parent who is in a similar boat and with whom you get along, and sharing a nanny becomes a shining beacon in the stormy sea that is the childcare search.

Whatever the reason, one question always seems to pop up, nagging one’s subconscious: does a nanny share work?

What is a nanny share?

A nanny share is when two or more families employ a nanny who takes care of both families’ children. The nanny earns more than if they were working for one family, but each individual family ends up paying less than they would if they were the sole employer. In a place like New York City, where high-quality daycares can be tricky to find, that’s worth a lot.

In theory, a nanny share sounds like a solid childcare solution and a win for all.

In theory, a nanny share sounds like a solid childcare solution and a win for all. And for some NYC families it can be exactly what they hoped for. But there are a lot of details to iron out and a few common hiccups that appear along the way when you share a nanny.

Aligning logistics with your NYC nanny share

In an ideal nanny share set-up, the sharing NYC families would live close to one other. This makes it easy for one family to drop off their kids at the other’s house or for the nanny to do pickup. If kids are going to preschool or school and need drop offs, that’s another detail to consider. Can the nanny manage to take all the kids where they need to go at the right time?

New York families are busy and kids may have activities all over town. Would it be safe for the nanny to manage all of the children on the subway if needed? If one family requires driving as part of the daily tasks, does the car have enough car seats for everyone? In this scenario, families who have similar routines in nearby locations may be the best match to share a nanny. 

Aligning ideals with the other NYC family

For many families, the absolutely most important factor in whether or not the nanny share will work out is if the families like each other. It may seem irrelevant, but the fact is that your child or children will to a degree be raised together with these other children, you will see a lot of each other and have to agree on a lot in terms of arrangements, and when a conflict arises, you will have to solve them just between your two (or more) NYC families.

Discuss these nanny share preferences with the other family:

  • child-rearing styles

  • conflict management processes

  • employment details

Define these ideals before you start looking for a nanny share and you’ll be much more aligned and able to handle any snags along the way. In a daycare, there is neutral ground and the caregivers are employed by the center, but with a nanny share, it all falls on you.

The more you and the other parents like each other and get along, the better poised you will be to work through conflicts when they come up. 

Scheduling issues with a nanny share

Naps are a common issue when several children of different ages or routines share a nanny. During the toddler years, naps can get quite long and take up a significant chunk of the day, mid-day. If you then have one 13-month-old sleeping from 11-2 and the 2-year-old from another family doesn’t go down until 1:30, the nanny and any other children can be confined to the home for 4-5 hours on a daily basis.

When considering a nanny share, it’s important to look at everyone’s schedules - as well as try to predict how they may change in the future. 

Nanny shares are more work, for you and the nanny

For a nanny in New York, the obvious benefit of a nanny share is the opportunity for a higher rate. However, it comes with caveats. For the nanny, a nanny share means managing more employers, more expectations - which may contradict one another - and more employment paperwork.

Nannies have to navigate a careful balance to make sure both families are happy, confirming time off with everyone involved and handling conflicts between the children to everyone’s satisfaction. 

The truth is, a nanny share is a lot more work, so the nanny earns every bit of that higher rate.

Before hiring a caregiver, sit down with the other family and look over the job outline. Confirm your expectations, your preferences in case of a conflict, and set up a time on a regular basis when all the parents and the nanny can check in and chat about how things are going. 

At the end of the day, the answer to the question if nanny shares work is It depends. It’s a lot of work, and the more you can iron out details before getting started, the better chance you’ll have. 

Let us find the best nanny for your NYC family

As a long-time nanny agency in NYC, we know what it takes to make a successful connection.

If you’ve tried a nanny share and it wasn’t for you, or if you’re tired of searching for childcare on your own, Smart Sitting has you covered.

We work with the best nannies and sitters in NYC. By getting to know your family and your needs, we’ll connect you with the caregiver that’s just right for you. Reach out today!

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