How to handle scope creep and protect your sanity
It’s incredibly common for nannies and sitters to get asked for “just one more thing.” The parents might say, “The baby is sleeping, could you fold our laundry?” or “Can you walk the dog real quick before you go?” A quick errand or extra task here and there feels harmless… until it doesn’t. What starts as “just this once” can gradually become expected, and before you know it you’re spending more time doing dishes or errands than caring for the children.
This phenomenon, we call it “job creep” or scope creep, happens when responsibilities expand beyond the original scope of the job without agreement or compensation. It can leave even the best nannies feeling taken advantage of and overwhelmed. The good news? You can set clear boundaries and maintain a positive working relationship with the family. Here’s how.
Why Boundary Setting Matters
Nannying is a professional role focused on the safety, well-being, and development of children. You know this (and parents technically do, too.) While a certain amount of light housekeeping, like cleaning up after kids or tidying toy messes, is part of that role, there’s a line between child-related chores and household tasks that aren’t part of your job.
When you continually say “yes” to every extra ask, even the small ones, it sets a precedent. Suddenly you’re washing parents’ clothes, unloading the dishwasher, walking the dog, running errands, or cleaning rooms no one has agreed you’re responsible for. Over time, this not only shifts your workload, it chips away at your energy and focus where it matters most: the children.
A Positive, Solutions-Oriented Approach
Here’s the key: you can be both firm and friendly. The bottom line is both you and the parents want a positive working relationship. Frankly, most of the time, parents don’t realize how scope creep might be taking away from your childcaring time, or that it might be outside of your tasks.
But being a professional means setting limits and handling conflicts that come up. The outcome? You’ll be more focused, less stressed, and more effective in your work.
Start With Clarity Upfront
At the beginning of a job, it’s helpful to have a conversation about responsibilities. We always recommend nannies to iron out the details – on paper – in their job contract (more on that below). That way everyone knows what’s expected, and it’s easy to refer back to this contract for anything that’s out of the expectation.
It’s also much easier to set boundaries and discuss expectations before the job has started. Then it’s not conflict management, but simply onboarding to a job. If you’re working with a nanny agency like Smart Sitting, we’ll help you review your contract, go over any questions (and nudge parents who are reluctant to spell things out…).
Your Cheatsheet: Scripts You Can Use
We know it can be hard to know what to say or how to say it, especially early in your career where each conflict has your heart beating a hundred miles an hour and it seems easier to just cave and walk the dog. That’s why we’re giving you this cheatsheet – a few lines to memorize before stepping up to the plate.
When asked to do unrelated tasks:
“Hey, family laundry isn’t technically part of my tasks. Is there something related to the kiddo I can do that would free up time for you to do that?”
If you’re okay doing a task occasionally but don’t want it to become expected:
“Listen, I love the dog, but walking him at the end of my shift tends to run over the time. It’s hard for me to wrap up the day with the kiddo and get everything cleaned up so there’s enough time for the dog. I’m happy to help with that in an emergency like today, but not all the time!”
When you’re not comfortable doing it at all:
“I’m sorry, I don’t feel comfortable doing that. But I can totally keep the kids occupied/out of the house if it makes it easier for you to do without us here.”
When asked a task you don’t mind but want to clarify compensation:
“I’m happy to add on cooking dinner/buying groceries/meal prepping before I go every day, if that’s something you want. But since that’s not part of my original agreement with you guys, could we discuss compensation for the extra time?”
The key is to remain friendly, respectful, and clear without being rude. Remember, most of the time parents aren’t trying to squeeze extra work out of you, they just don’t realize that it adds to your work load or takes away from your efforts with the kiddos. Keeping that in focus typically helps keep a positive air to the conversation.
Lean On Your Contract
We’ve said this a hundred times, and we’re happy to say it again: one of the best ways to prevent job creep is to outline duties in writing. If your contract specifies that your role is childcare and related tasks (diapering, meal prep for kids, laundry for kids, tidying kids’ play areas), then things like folding parents’ laundry or running unrelated errands should trigger a conversation, not an expectation.
If your contract doesn’t define duties clearly yet, it’s never too late to revisit it. Ask for a meeting to:
Review your job description
List the tasks you already do
Clarify what falls inside/outside your role
Agree on compensation for expanded duties
A written agreement protects both you and the family, and it gives you a reference point for difficult conversations. If not sooner, it’s generally easy to ask for an updated contract as you come up on a year mark with your family. It’s a great time to look over the contract, revise duties, talk raises!, and let the family realize how valuable you are to them!
Communication is good for the relationship
Many nannies worry that setting boundaries will make them seem difficult and will make the family not want to work with them anymore. In reality, clear boundaries are respectful communication. Parents want consistency and reliability. When your role is clearly defined, everyone knows what to expect. That prevents frustration, misunderstandings, and resentment – all of which harm relationships far more than a calm, honest boundary talk.
Plus, this way the family knows that you’ll bring up any issues and won’t just become resentful and leave. If they love you, they’ll want you to stick around!
And if you’re still feeling unsure or nervous (and you’re a Smart Sitter) – reach out to us. What else is a nanny agency good for (besides finding you a great job!) if not to support you when you need it? With our 15 years of meeting families and helping nannies, we’ve learned a thing or two about managing conflicts and understanding both sides.
If you’re not yet a Smart Sitter, but would like to be (who can blame you!), fill out an application via the button below. We’re pretty selective when it comes to who we work with, but that’s because working with the best means we can place you in amazing nanny jobs through thoughtful matches. We can’t wait to hear from you!