Nannying basics: Navigating your infant nanny job with a work from home parent
Can you do your work well when the boss is around?
The evolving landscape of work has seen an increasing number of parents adopting the work-from-home model. This, in turn, has ushered in a new dynamic for nannies: performing their job duties of taking care of infants and kiddos in the same space as the parent.
(Of course, for infant nannies working with stay-at-home parents, this has long been the case.)
While this situation might present challenges, it can be navigated with a few key strategies such as effective communication, setting helpful boundaries, and understanding the child’s experience in it all. If you are an infant nanny with a parent employer in the home where you work, read on! We’ve gathered all the guidance you’ll need to succeed.
Communication is key
It bears repeating
We say this nearly every time we talk about the nanny-parent relationship, and it bears repeating: communication is key. Establishing open, respectful, and consistent communication is crucial when working in a family, and when you are both working alongside each other, this becomes even more so.
Regular check-ins can help align expectations in terms of who does what and where when you’re both home. Ideally you’ll have this conversation at the beginning of your work with the family, but as you both learn and adapt it may be helpful to set up pre-planned checkins, rather than wait for things to get difficult.
Discuss:the parent's work schedule
their expectations during work hours
how you can work together to create a conducive environment for both the child and the working parent
However, communication isn't just about talking; it's also about listening. Listen to the parent's needs and concerns, and be empathetic to their needs. Working from home when your baby is crying (or having the time of their life) in the next room isn’t going to be easy for the parent either.
Clear, compassionate communication fosters trust, the bedrock of a strong nanny-family relationship.
Maintain boundaries in both directions
Working in a home where a parent is always present can blur boundaries. Where does the parent work? Where do you work? Does having the parent come in and out of your space make it harder for the kiddo to follow your lead or create a lot of extra separation tears? Does the parent expect you and the child to stay as quiet as possible, or maybe spend much of the day out of the house?
As you can see, there’s a lot of questions, and it's essential to define these boundaries from the onset. A view of the two sides:
Respect the parent's work space and time, keeping interruptions to a minimum unless necessary. This allows the parent to concentrate on their work, and assures them of your ability to independently take care of the child's needs.
Discuss your own need for autonomy in taking care of the infant. Parents may feel compelled to intervene or micromanage, especially when they hear the child crying. (It’s hard for parents to hear and not do anything!) Agree on guidelines and seek their trust in your professional capabilities. Keep in mind that it may take a while to build that trust.
What about the child-parent separation?
If you’re a nanny, you know how hard it can be for the kiddo to say goodbye to mom or dad in the beginning. Tears streaming, little hands clinging, and then two minutes after the parent has left, everything is sunshine and smiles. But if this separation happens several times throughout the day, and the kiddo knows their parent is just behind the door to the home office, those tears can become inconsolable.
There are a few ways you can go about making this easier not just for the kiddo, but for the adults as well. Be patient, and keep in mind that you may need to comfort the parent a bit too at first. Everyone wants to feel like someone has this under control, and if you can make sure that person is you, you’ll get all the nannying gold stars.
Method 1: happy distraction
If there is time, patience, and wiggle room in the parent’s work situation, a slow and gradual separation may be a good option. Engage the infant in fun, captivating activities that shift their focus from the parent to you, while the parent is still around. Ideally, the child will get more comfortable with you and be so distracted by all the fun you’re having, that the separation doesn’t feel like such a big deal.
Method 2: set clear boundaries for the home office
Another method is one where you sort of trick the child into having a similar separation in the morning as they would if the parent was going to work. The parent says goodbye for the day, goes into their office, closes the door, and that’s it. The parent is then mindful to only come out when you and the kid are out, during nap time, or at times when they can stay and spend time with the kid for a while before leaving again. Perhaps you can decide that lunch time is family time and the parent comes out for an hour. This way, you know what to expect, the child learns the rules, and the parent can relax and focus on their work.
Each work-from-home family is unique
It’s also important to remember that everyone is different. For some parents, working from home means they get to see their children all day, and they don’t mind if it gets loud around them or the kiddo wants to sit in their lap while they work. Others need to fully disconnect and treat the setup as though they were in the office. Some parents may want to join you in Thursday afternoon gymboree!
At the end of the day, what makes the parents and kiddo happy is the most important bit. Working with stay-at-home or work-from-home parents isn’t every infant nanny’s favorite set-up, and that’s okay, too. Think about what works for you and listen to your gut.
Personal fit matters
To that end, this is definitely a scenario where the personal fit between you and the parents is super important. If you’re going to need to communicate, empathize, adjust, and work together for the family’s well-being on a day-to-day basis, you want to do it with someone who you really like. Again, let your gut have a say. (The same goes for the parent, by the way. If you two like each other, it’ll be that much easier to coexist in the home!)
Things that can help your job satisfaction and the parent’s peace of mind:
Your ability to adapt to the family's style, values, and expectations
Agreeing on important aspects like discipline, nutritional preferences, and daily routines
Remember, every day is an opportunity to refine your skills, deepen your understanding of infant care, and strengthen your relationships with both the child and the parent. Embrace the journey, and let it take some time. You may find that nannying in a work-from-home environment can be a rewarding and enriching experience, filled with opportunities for collaboration and relationship building.
Are you looking for your next great nanny job?
Apply to Smart Sitting and let us see if we can match you with your ideal job and family!
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